Cell phones and why they have no place in our store.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Or any store for that matter. Remember last week when we talked about ignoring employees and how we hate that? Yeah this is kind of like that. Sure, we all have cell phones. Sure, we all get important and emergency calls that we have to take right that minute. But what we don't have to do is scream into our cell phones in public about our spreading yeast infections. Especially at my register while I ring up your purchase.

My store, like most mall stores, has it's own music pumped in through speakers. Most of the time it's kept at a level that is loud enough to clearly hear the music, but still low enough that you can hear people who are speaking at a normal volume. So when you walk in to these tiny mall stores, screaming into your phone about your business, you are even more of a fool than you look if you think everyone isn't paying attention to the dumb shit you think is more important than everyone else and judging you for it.

Ever notice when you're in some stores on your phone, the music seems unnecessarily loud? Yeah, we turn it up if you're being excessively obnoxious. I don't really want to hear about your last abortion or how your boyfriend gave you herpes. Seriously. These are things you talk about IN PRIVATE. So yes, I will crank my stereo as loud as the mall itself allows in order to either get you out of my store with this nonsense, or hang up so I don't have to hear it. And every other customer in my store is aware of what I am doing. And supports it. Because they don't want to hear it either.

I mean, taking off my name tag, and sitting here as just a normal person, WHY????? Why do you need to talk about really private matters, in public, in a loud enough voice that people OUTSIDE of my store can hear you? Huh? What happened to the days of not airing your dirty laundry in public? When did that stop?

And let's take this lack of manners just one step further. When you are ready to pay for your things: Hang. Up. The. Damned. Phone. It's just common courtesy. I'm not standing here bullshitting with my coworkers about what we're doing later tonight and ignoring you. I'm giving you my full attention and I deserve the same respect. You are no better than I am. I promise. Or at the very least, tell your BFFL to hang on, put the phone down, finish the transaction and then continue your conversation. Your husband will still be a cheating bastard after you've paid for your things.

And sometimes, yes. The call is VERY important. Your child was seriously injured at school. Your spouse found out they are getting laid off. Someone died. It happens, and when it does, I will be more than understanding if you just slightly pull your attention away from the conversation, mouth "I'm sorry" at me, and try to keep up with what's happening so you can pay me at an appropriate time. I will quickly and silently ring up your things. Point at the total, run your card, and hand you a receipt mouthing the words "Thank you" as to not interrupt whatever major life thing is happening. And I won't mind. I've had things like that happen in my life, and sometimes I get the call just as I'm getting in line to check out. But I will not stand in front of some poor cashier, yelling over the music about how I think my husband knows I've been cheating on him with his brother, while I shove my debit card in that poor girl's face before she's even rang an item in. Not because I know her pain, because I am a decent human being.

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